When I was young, I was always on the receiving end. I often hoped that one day, I would have the ability to give something to others, to find meaning and value in my own life.
I think, many times, I am moved by the kindness of others because, from a young age, I learned that being loved is not something easily gained. In elementary school, when I visited friends’ homes, their parents would warmly welcome me, and I could feel the care and love they received from their families. In contrast, I grew up learning mostly how to be alone. I could spend an entire day listening to songs on the radio and reading all sorts of books. This self-reliance helped me to participate in various speech and writing competitions, earning awards both inside and outside of school.
As I grew older, I sometimes felt conflicted by a mature mind within an undeveloped body. Fortunately, sports (like Tai Chi, basketball, and soccer) provided me with an outlet for my rebellious spirit. My achievements in sports revealed an unwillingness to bow down to life. As a child, I was very stubborn, perhaps because there was no one around to teach me the art of compromise. I was quite hard-headed as a child (laughs).
During six years of boarding school in middle and high school, I felt like a rough stone, constantly bumping and clashing. But I was lucky to encounter many good teachers and coaches. They saw the wounds hidden behind my laughter and helped me in ways different from others. They made me feel warmth and trust. Perhaps because of my innocence and seriousness towards myself, I attracted many mentors willing to help me. Even now, I feel incredibly fortunate.
Everyone learns through life, trying to overcome and grow through the challenges they face. If we didn’t feel a lack, why would we pursue fulfillment? Even now, I still feel there is much I need to learn and many ways I can improve. We all start as naïve children; we all make mistakes. But as long as we keep striving for progress with a grateful and kind heart, I believe we can become stronger. We’ll not only accept the beauty the world offers but also have the ability to bring happiness and joy to those around us. May we all pursue a better version of ourselves, with the courage and capacity to love and be loved.
Never forget why you started.
To youth,
— From 30-year-old me
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